It’s my birthday today and in keeping with tradition, I’m sharing my annual birthday reflection. 

I recently returned from a 3-week trip through Europe with my parents. It was great until Luna unexpectedly passed away. Liam called me a dozen times at 2am until I finally woke up to the buzzing of my phone. I said goodbye to Luna on FaceTime and spent another week in London, crying alone in my hotel room.

I met Luna on Liam’s and my first date - a doggy play date at a park in Hollywood. I arrived with low expectations, I thought Liam was going to be another unemployed LA pretty boy. But as we sat in the grass chatting, Luna broke the ice by squatting over my legs and peeing on me, something she’d never done before or since. I like to think that she chose me, that she knew I was the one for her human, but she was probably just anxious - she was an amusingly anxious girl. Liam was so embarrassed and sweet afterward, we continued our date and talked for 3 hours that night and every day since then. Luna’s been a pillar of our relationship for the past 6 years and it’s hard to imagine her not in it. 

But it has been healing to be back home, grieving with Liam. We brought home her ashes this week and packed away the reminders of her that still lingered in the house - her bowls, her toys, her leash, etc. We’ve made each other laugh recalling her odd behaviors, gone through photos and videos of her together. 

The news of death never comes at a good time. For me it’s come during a magic show, while on vacation, and in the middle of the night. It is always jarring, suspending everything around you, and yet the world still turns, life moves forward. 

The experience has reminded me of a few things. 

• The first is the fragility and impermanence of life. Nothing is guaranteed, every day is a gift, so love deeply and practice presence often. 

• The second is that there is always something to be gained from loss. Losing Luna has deepened Liam’s and my connection and softness with each other in a way I’ve never experienced before, and it’s made me even more grateful for our partnership. 

• Finally, that being human is inherently filled with emotional contradictions. I grieved Luna while also being grateful for the time I spent with my parents abroad. I have laughed through my tears and vice versa (laughter really is the best medicine). I have cried on calls with my direct reports and immediately switched gears into making business decisions, I am capable of doing both. Of feeling my big feelings and still getting shit done. 

I know this feeling is temporary, that eventually the sadness will pass and what will remain is the joy of having loved so profoundly and the resilience that comes from moving through grief. I am strong and confident because of how deeply I feel. 

Whatever you’re going through, I hope this reflection also gives you strength.